Friday, March 14, 2008

A brick Wall

In my life I've never been told that I'm not good enough to do anything my heart desires. I was taught that where there is a will there is a way. In the Air Force I was recognized by senior leadership on a regular basis for various things I did. So, on Thursday afternoon when I met with my new advisor at school, I did not understand it when she said that I would not be getting accepted into the Fall 2008 Radiologic Technology program. This is a selective admissions program that only 20 students out of 100's of applicants get accepted into each year by scoring high in a rubics of somesort that admissions has created to deem who makes the cut. I have never been told that there's not a loop hole I can find or a way to get what I want. In my various jobs I have never been held back. I could not accept this brick wall that stood between me and my dream.
My advisor was thorough in explaing why.
1'st: in 2004 I failed Chem 105 at Lake Land and that F counts stronger than any other grade because it was a science. It doesn't matter that the reason I failed was because I had just gotten out of the Air Force and was unprepared for the kick in the ass depression that hit me like a ton of bricks. The technical term for "can't get my ass off the couch - even to take my crazy pills" is what they called "Separation Anxiety." It makes sense. My whole world changed when I got out of the AF. But obviously, nobody in the military that outprocessed me had ever gotten out of the AF so they didn't know how hard it could be on a person to transition back into the civillian lifestyle. I was irresponsible during that time and never properly withdrew fom the class - or any of my other pre-med classes. Instead, I just quit going. I messed up. I have retaken most of the other classes dropped in '04 and have replaced those F's or D's with A's and B's. I am even in Chemistry now - w/ an A... but it won't help me get accepted into the program, now. I take responsibility for what happened. I messed up.
2nd reason: My first advisor at Parkland was a moron. He put me in the wrong math class meaning I missed out on a biology class that could have helped get me accepted. When I went over my application with him he knew my Lake Land grades but never bothered to tell me that I would probably not be accepted for the Fall '08 semester. Instead he let me take the needless math class and a health occupations chemistry class that I'm not sure will ever count as anything for a different major.

So... you're probably thinking that I'm going nuts. You know the Christina that always has a PLAN. The Christina that lives for a well thought out PLAN that is seen through until the end. The Christina that has a mild obsession with planning. So, what in the world would this Christina do when her plan was crumbled to pieces?!?

Well, I am very lucky to have a best friend like Tiffany. She understands my need for a plan. She called me late Thursday afternoon and together we scouted out my options and derived a new plan. (ahhh... yes... that meant I could somehow breath again.) Things are still a little up in the air but at this point my plan is to meet with the head of the Respiratory Therapy program and sell my ass off to get considered for that program. It was a career I had thought about before but for some reason didn't pick it. This program is a little easier to get in to - mostly because it's not as popular as radiology.
To prevent myself from nearing a nervous breakdown if I'm not admitted into Respiratory Therapy... we came up with a back-up plan. Parkland and several other colleges offer a Mass Communications degree. It is very broad but I can focus on public relations and photojournalism. I have a passion for photography so this could be my ticket to making it a career.

A couple shout outs:
1: To my super studly husband. Thank-you for all of your support.
2: To Tiffany! Thank-you, thank-you, thank-you! You know the meaning of a true plan and the obsession I have with them. Thank-you for keeping me sane! Thank-you for not thinking my crazy plan-aholic lifestyle is nuttso!


Susan said...

So sorry to hear of your dilemma. I never knew it was so hard to get into the radiology program. I admire you for accepting your mess-up in the past, and your determination to make a go in getting accepting in some medical field. How about nursing? There are so many different fields you can go into with a nursing degree. Are you able to job shadow a respiration therapist to see if that is your interest before you get into it? Maybe you'd want to job shadow various medical jobs. But then again, go with what is in your heart. I'll keep you in my prayers, along with Chris, that you both may decide on a job that brings you fulfillment and happiness. God bless you with his guiding Spirit!
Love, Susan

Anonymous said...

You are welcome! That is what friends are for. You are always there to support me and I'm there for you no matter what babe! I love ya!


Christina said...

Susan, thanks for the support. I appreciate it. When I was first deciding between respiratory therapist and rad. tech. - it was a toss up - so I think I'd be happy as a resp. therapist. I'm just not getting my hopes up. I think I can be happy doing anything. :-) Looking forward to seeing you on Sunday!